Chapter 20

Translated by boilpoil Edited by boilpoil

Jian Yiguang is still waiting for his answer, but Bai Lianhua doesn’t know how to respond at all.

After a while, Jian Yiguang closes his eyes, forfeiting their standoff.

“I understand.”

No, what did you understand? What made you understand?

Wait!

Bai Lianhua tries to put up a smile, “what are you thinking. Why would I not care about you…” You’re my mission objective. I came to this world because of you; you’re the whole world for me. All the genuine kindness from my heart were there for you.

——As a host who is here to complete a mission, he’s already done the best he could.

“But this care, is not much fundamentally different from you caring about anything else. Like a book you kind of enjoy. If it becomes wet after falling onto the floor, you’ll be concerned and pick it up and put it back into its place; like a plant you sort of appreciate. If it isn’t taken indoors in time as a storm rages, you’ll also be concerned. You’ll put it where it can be sheltered before the wind and rain arrived.”

“What you did for me is of course far more than these, but, perhaps it would sound ungrateful, it still gives me the same feeling.”

“Bai Lianhua. Is there nothing at all inside your mind that is unique, irreplaceable, separate from all there is in the world?”

Bai Lianhua opens his mouth but no words come out.

No. There really isn’t any in his mind, neither people nor thing. An inappropriately timed example perhaps, but even if he complained about how there was a severe lack of computers, but throughout all these worlds, he’s acted fine without it. As for obsessions greater in degree, there isn’t any.

Jian Yiguang sounds more depressed in tone than usual, “this is the most terrifying characteristic of you.”

This is like a special power only Bai Lianhua had. He can easily, harmlessly, irresistibly invade someone else’s mind and root himself deep into it. Though for he himself? He rejects any attempt to probe his inner self. Nobody is able to truly leave a trace inside.

“You might look soft, easy to get; but really, when you truly want to treasure and appreciate it, that’s when you’ll realise it is completely sealed up. There is nowhere to start.”

Bai Lianhua “…”

He feels himself getting more and more chilly. Why is our antagonist here concerned over whether his heart is soft or not in such a grandiose tone?

Jian Yiguang continues, “Bai Lianhua, your place in my mind and mine in yours, is fundamentally different.”

Here it comes, here it comes. The bad premonitions——Perhaps because he has already experienced a baptism of love from an antagonist, Bai Lianhua has become sensitive to such a suggestive atmosphere. If the plot continues this way, what follows would be…

No no no, stop stop stop. Please, Mr. antagonist, be more creative. Let’s not tread paths already explored, let’s not engage in clichés, alright? There is going to be a godly twist to follow right?!

Come, tell me, you just have trouble expressing yourself. This is why you always say stuff that makes people misunderstanding. At your core, you’re still as straight as a steel pole, definitely!

In the real world aren’t there also some straight guys that always sound gay-ish when they talk, no? They’re super straight though, and antagonist you’re definitely one of them!

Bai Lianhua continues to murmur inside.

The system sounds as if pitying, “it’s useless, host, stop struggling.”

“Go away!” I, white lotus… no wait, I mean… Bai Lianhua, will never surrender!

Jian Yiguang, though, is clearly not going to do as Bai Lianhua wishes, and he betrays Bai Lianhua’s expectations.

He chuckles, “when you left me then, I still didn’t understand my emotions towards you. I only knew that I felt extremely sad… Now that I think about it, that is because I have projected all the positive emotions I have for this world onto you alone. You have completely fulfilled my adoration for the good in life alone. It has become hard for me to differentiate my personal feelings for you.”

“Now that you’re back, I already knew what I actually wanted.”

“All these condensed emotions are just the word ‘love.’ I want you by my side forever. I want you to only be able to see me in your eyes. I want you to belong to me whole… That is your place in my mind.”

Oh Lord, what terrifying news.

#Broken antagonist always confesses to returnee white lotus, what’s the reason?#

#Is this a shame on all antagonists, or a misfortune on all white lotuses?#

Even with the affair with Wen Fu, and all the actions that Jian Yiguang took before this that were hinting at this, Bai Lianhua still feels shocked.

This is infuriating! Why is it that when I didn’t know, you’ve all managed to curl into for me?

Bai Lianhua starts interrogating the system expressionlessly, “I did get the script for a white lotus right? System, you can’t have stolen some other host’s heart-throb halo and threw it onto me, surely?”

“Will you one day suddenly confess that ‘I have a dream, that one day I’ll be the first multi-property system ever’?”

“I’ll have to tell you that what this is is fraud. A white lotus should stay a white lotus. A white moonlight should stay a white moonlight. Why the heart-throb business?”

The system looks innocent, “host, you’re being stereotypical. First, who told you that a white lotus can’t be appealing and these properties can’t be perfectly compatible with each other. Second, this isn’t my fault. I can’t control whether the antagonist falls in love with you. It’s the host’s fault for being too attractive.”

Bai Lianhua “…” When have you learned sophism?

Bai Lianhua is unable to recall at all what kind of suggestive acts there might have been between his past interactions with the antagonist. There’s Wen Fu? Fine. Now there’s Jian Yiguang?

He isn’t born with maxed out flirting skills, nor does he have maxed flowery speech skills like the antagonists. He’s also unfamiliar to any sort of physical contact with the antagonists. They still managed to fall in love with this minimal contact?

He’s always seen himself as a guidance for the antagonists in their lives, a bright lighthouse on their path forward… They can be bros, partners, friends. He asks nothing in return for helping them, his generosity could move the whole world. Only, that there is no option of being romantic partners.

And what Jian Yiguang just said… Makes him sound like a guy with a steeled heart.

Bai Lianhua touches his own chest, asking the system, “am I really like what Jian Yiguang says?” There must be a misunderstanding here. He’s as soft as it gets.

The system that’s always talkative and going ‘blablabla’ suddenly goes silent, pretending it’s not there.

It even makes Bai Lianhua question whether he’d accidentally cut off the connection with the system from his side again. He checks it, but it turns out he didn’t.

Bai Lianhua is bummed. He’s not even going to say anything about how unreliable the system normally is. Now he’s even no longer able to complain to it? What use is this system?

Oh well, he’s on his own. Bai Lianhua thinks about how he will have to word this.

——Mm. I’m touched. But I refuse.

——You’re a good person, but we’re not meant for each other.

——Thank you for liking me. I hope we can still be friends.

Besides all these, is there any more classics he can throw out there?

His thoughts drift here and there for a while, but in the end, Bai Lianhua still retrieves the disposition he should possess as a world-saving white lotus.

He opens his mouth, speaking in a lamenting tone, “fine, as you said, you like me, and you only care about my opinion… But what if I am disappointed in you because of that?”

“Jian Yiguang, I can’t destroy you myself, but that doesn’t mean I won’t feel disappointed.”

“You don’t care what others think. Then do you not care about my disappointment either?”

The system pops back up and starts applauding in amazement, “great job, host, what an explosive performance! You are an expert, even advancing the mission when you’re panicking, to act as a good white lotus… I’ve become a top fan of you from this moment onwards!”

“No thanks. You’re fired from my fan group.” Bai Lianhua feels he’s become more fearless now. He didn’t even dare converse with the system in front of Wen Fu in the beginning, afraid of exposing it. Now, in front of Jian Yiguang, he can already go so far as to bully the system with a straight face.

Jian Yiguang’s expression stiffens.

“No. If possible, I hope I leave the most perfect impression of myself in your mind. Omnipotent, flawless… If possible.”

“I do care about what you think.”

He switches his topic suddenly, and smiles gently, “I’m really happy though… I thought you’d really choose to blow the cover on everything online.”

“If it were anyone else doing that, I have countless ways I could make them disappear. If it’s you, though, I choose to cease and desist… I told you I waited a whole day, that was the truth.”

“But you didn’t do that. Which means that, you, forever on the side of good, cannot resolutely choose to punish me either.”

So, in your mind, I’m still at least a bit different from everything else.

“So, that’s enough. I won’t force your hand… Nor do I really want to taint you black; if you were trying to keep this secret forever, though, I’m afraid you’ll never be able to sleep well again.”

Jian Yiguang approaches Bai Lianhua, saying, “so, there’s another way to stop me.”

Bai Lianhua immediately lifts his face up expectantly after hearing so. His eyes are also enlarged, big, round, sparkling. Jian Yiguang barely holds back from touching them… He feels as if he can extract starlight from it.

“I can concede… Bai Lianhua, just you and me becoming data, then I’ll never obsess over anyone else.”

“Just you and me.”

Bai Lianhua “???”

——Giving this other solution instantly. Not even you’d believe it if you told me you weren’t planning this all along, would you?

Author’s notes: White lotty, who thinks he’s won over the antagonist and is being happy when he fell into another trap of the antagonist: …Ah, life sure is difficult for a

lotus_(:з」∠)_

Broken theatre act:

White lotty is pulling flower petals in silence. The words ‘I’m scummy’ and ‘I’m not scummy’ plays out in loop until all the petals fell. He shudders in chilliness as a breeze blows by him, and he realises he’s been pulling on his own petals the whole time. So he goes ‘owwwh’ and starts crying.

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