Chapter 1

"If only, I could start over."

— This is the most repeated thought amidst the jumbled thoughts of a man who is almost thirty, has achieved nothing, and knows that he cannot even imagine himself as a writer, on each ordinary and simple lonely night.

...

In the morning, the sun in spring poured down on the square of the Guangzhou railway station.

The vast square had few places to shelter from the sun, and most of the people rushing to catch their trains quickly darted into the waiting room to escape the heat.

Getting out of the taxi, Zhou Kuan looked around on the curb, then took a few steps to the southeast, standing with his back to the central axis of the station.

The flow of vehicles, the crowd, and the overpass that blocked most of the view ahead, along with the high-rise buildings further away, formed Zhou Kuan's last impression of the bustling Guangzhou.

After a while, Zhou Kuan took a deep breath of car exhaust, turned to face the eight bright red characters "Unify the Motherland, Revitalize China," hesitated slightly, adjusted the strap of the backpack on his right shoulder, and walked towards the waiting hall.

Following the procedures, he queued up, swiped his ID, went through security, and entered the station to wait for the train.

According to the signs, he entered the corresponding waiting room, chose a corner to wait with his head down, not playing with his phone and without any expression.

At 12:00 PM, an ordinary express train from Guangzhou to Nanshan departed from the platform, taking 10 hours and 6 minutes to reach Nanshan.

In 2021, few young people chose to travel long distances by ordinary express trains.

Zhou Kuan's last ride on an ordinary express train was about 9 years ago when he was still in college.

This time was an exception. Zhou Kuan deliberately chose the slowest transportation option from Guangzhou to Nanshan and even picked the most expensive soft sleeper on the ordinary express train, buying four tickets for a soft sleeper compartment.

After walking to the corresponding soft sleeper compartment, Zhou Kuan stood at the door for a moment.

When the attendant came over, Zhou Kuan politely asked, "Hello, I bought a compartment ticket. Can I lock the door?"

As he spoke, Zhou Kuan subconsciously pressed his lips together and his Adam's apple moved.

The attendant checked Zhou Kuan's ticket information and nodded with a smile, "Of course."

Only then did Zhou Kuan enter, lock the door, and sit down.

The scenery outside the window quickly changed from the platform to the disordered houses and buildings along the railway.

Sitting on the lower berth, Zhou Kuan took out his phone and deleted various loan apps one by one. Soon, only a few utility and instant messaging apps remained on his phone.

Finally, Zhou Kuan checked his balance through the bank's WeChat official account.

A message quickly returned: "Your default card has a balance of 2009.19 RMB."

Zhou Kuan finally felt a great relief.

Like many young people who have achieved nothing, Zhou Kuan had high aspirations but a thin life, being both weak and ambitious. He first fell into the trap of advanced consumption and later believed he could easily make big gains, or failing that, set up a stall. With a mysterious confidence, he finally had a debt crisis over a year ago.

Fortunately, Zhou Kuan still knew the meaning of "diligence." Over the two years of economic downturn, he worked hard to pay off all his debts.

After that, he resigned, moved out, and packed his simple luggage, which could fit in a backpack, and booked a ticket back to his hometown, bidding farewell to Guangzhou.

Putting away his phone, he gazed out the window, lost in thought. Zhou Kuan muttered to himself, "It took me 12 years to realize that a good-for-nothing like me doesn't deserve to live in a big city like Guangzhou. I'm only fit to be a passerby. Now, it's most suitable for me to return to my small county town, like a refugee, to live a peaceful life."

Some vague memories flashed through his mind.

In the summer of 2009, Zhou Kuan, who received an admission notice from an ordinary university in Guangzhou, happily went south alone. Since the train station was far from the city center, his parents did not send him off.

He found a part-time job as a supermarket guide in the bustling Guangzhou and spent a very pleasant summer, saving over 2,000 RMB before the start of the school year.

In the spring and summer of 2021, after 12 years of ups and downs in Guangzhou, Zhou Kuan admitted that he did not belong there and returned to his hometown in a low profile. His bank card also had about 2,000 RMB left, and he had no friends to see him off...

The rhythmic sound of the train wheels was quite soothing in the afternoon.

Zhou Kuan did not resist the drowsiness, placing his hands on the small table in front of the window and resting his chin on them, waiting to fall asleep.

"Whoo~"

The lights in the compartment were not on, and when the train entered the tunnel, darkness enveloped him. Zhou Kuan closed his eyes, looking forward to the simple life in his hometown, and fell into a deep sleep.

...

"Hmm~ Hmm~ Hmm~"

Waking up from his sleep, Zhou Kuan stretched a big yawn, emitting some lazy groans, and immediately felt lighter.

Rubbing his eyes, Zhou Kuan muttered, "It's already dark."

Suddenly.

A strong tug came from the left.

"A-Kuan, stop daydreaming and look at what I found."

It was the long-missed hometown accent, spoken by a curly-haired teenager, with a somewhat frivolous and immature tone.

Zhou Kuan muttered, "I'm still dreaming."

He looked over and saw a curly-haired teenager sitting on the left, with some... simple and minimalist portrait pictures on the computer screen in front of him.

Zhou Kuan thought to himself, "The woman in the portrait has a pretty face, and she looks familiar."

He then thought, "This curly-haired teenager looks a bit like Liu Nian from over ten years ago. That guy used to be very nostalgic about his youthful slimness..."

Despite his thoughts, Zhou Kuan was annoyed that he was still having such a childish dream at 30 and said, "Is that it?"

"Is that not enough!" The curly-haired teenager sneered, "You've been thinking about this for days!"

Hearing this, Zhou Kuan was very unhappy. His dream could be mocked: "Nonsense, this is too childish. I wouldn't even look at it. I'd at least go to t()y.com!"

Saying this, Zhou Kuan took the keyboard from the seat next to him and quickly typed in the browser address bar, but the page did not exist.

Seeing this, the curly-haired teenager felt a bit disappointed but still muttered, "I told you, A-Kuan, you know that kind of..."

Seeing this, Zhou Kuan paused slightly, clicked on the 'My Computer' icon, and found the video file on the D drive, mocking, "Forgot to use a VPN to access the internet. What doesn't this internet cafe computer have?!"

The curly-haired teenager, who was still staring at the screen, had not finished his disdainful expression when his eyes suddenly widened, his eyes shining. He turned to Zhou Kuan and grinned, "Wow, A-Kuan, you're awesome! So awesome!"

Zhou Kuan waved his hand, not caring, and said, "You're already this big, stop watching so much porn and go out and practice more."

This tone and attitude gave him a sense of superiority.

There was no trace of the dejected and humble "fugitive" who had just left Guangzhou.

The curly-haired teenager, who was now in high spirits, raised his hand to the left and called out, "Come over quickly, I finally found something good!"