Chapter 30

What is most important to me?

I only realized it after losing it, managed to regain it, and then lost it again.

I can never get it back.

From that day on, Gilbert, the first prince of the empire, lost his vitality.

Not only did he lose what was most important to him, but he was also branded with numerous restrictions.

He could no longer become the emperor. He had given up on everything, including the future of this country.

"The successor to my father is up to you all—..."

Just as he was about to throw these words at the visiting prime ministers, his voice failed him.

The curse mark etched in his chest grew hot. The constricting pain subsided in an instant, but the discomfort made him wince.

Soon, he recalled the words of the man with the blue artifact.

—Choose someone who won't invade other countries. Someone who values the people.

The constraints etched by the kingdom's curse markers became an unbreakable curse.

(...So, I have to choose...)

Someone who values the people.

There is no one who fits that description.

Since being born as the first prince of the empire, he had been revered, worshipped, and celebrated.

Others, outside the royal family, were merely pawns to be commanded and moved at will.

Nothing more, nothing less.

There were those who opposed him, but they no longer existed in this world.

Feeling frustrated while the prime ministers waited for him to continue, a person suddenly came to mind.

(...Ah, I think I kept one alive... What was his name...)

There was one person, an exceptionally capable man.

He remembered vaguely that he had spared his life, thinking it would be a waste to kill him.

After a few days of torture as punishment, he should still be alive.

That man will do.

"I will announce the successor later. I am tired. Do as you please—... Damn."

Just as he was about to speak in a commanding tone, he was at a loss for words.

It was frustrating not to be able to speak freely. Why did he have to choose his words?

While feeling frustrated, he searched for words he could say.

"...Do as you please. I want you to leave... now."

He urged them to leave with unfamiliar words. As the prime ministers left the room, he leaned back on the sofa and closed his eyes.

Why did he feel so exhausted after just a few minutes of conversation?

Feeling frustrated, yet powerless to do anything.

(...Everything is so troublesome...)

Gilbert decided to spend the rest of his life quietly in the detached palace, wanting to avoid interacting with others as much as possible.

In a room in a corner of the detached palace with poor sunlight, an unkempt garden stretched out in front of him, and a large tree obstructed the precious sunlight that came through the window.

"I am very sorry. I will immediately take care of it, so please be merciful."

This place, which had been completely neglected and unseen from the outside, was suddenly put to use.

There was no time to tidy up the exterior, but that was no excuse.

The female servant bowed deeply.

"It doesn't matter."

The view from the room's window was irrelevant.

The dimness of the room was even convenient. He just wanted to spend his time quietly, without thinking.

Not being able to see the blue sky from the window seemed like a good thing to him.

He never wanted to see that color again, as it reminded him of her.

If they wanted to tidy up the garden, that was fine, but he didn't want the large tree to be cut down, so he spoke up.

"The branches of this tree—..."

He tried to speak in a commanding tone, but it was impossible.

His chest was constricted again.

"Damn it."

The frustration of not being able to speak as he wished. Unable to control his anger, he punched the wall.

The female servant turned pale and shrank back.

Gilbert clenched his aching right hand and gritted his teeth.

"This tree doesn't need to be trimmed. I want you to leave. I want to be alone."

"Y-Yes! I will take my leave now."

He managed to force out the words and glared at her, and the woman hurriedly left the room.

Gilbert collapsed onto the leather sofa.

For him, giving orders to others was as natural as breathing.

As a royal, it was a given, but now that he couldn't do it, what was he?

Thinking about it alone wouldn't yield any answers.

"Everything is so troublesome..."

Gilbert lay down on the sofa and closed his eyes.

He wanted to fall asleep, but he couldn't.

The woman with long blue hair kept appearing in his mind.

Her light purple eyes rarely showed emotion, and she had never once given him a gentle smile.

She was the only one who was expressionless, indifferent, and disrespectful.

"Damn, don't come to mind."

Tears welled up in his eyes, defying his frustration.

He didn't need such emotions.

If he couldn't have her, he wished he had never noticed her.

While staring into space, he tried to say her name softly.

"...Damn..."

He couldn't even call out her name.

The woman who existed only in his memory was out of reach.

Tears silently fell, and he didn't know how many times this had happened.

***

Gilbert spent his days like a shell in the detached palace, even losing his appetite.

Changing clothes, bathing, everything was irrelevant, but the female servants continued to take care of him as they always had.

He couldn't order them to stop, and choosing his words was too troublesome.

He just let them do as they pleased.

Even though he had lost everything, the women who took care of him remained unchanged.

However, they seemed to be getting more nagging.

"Prince Gilbert, staying in your room all the time is not good for your health. I recommend you take a walk, even if it's just a little."

"Prince Gilbert, let me fix your hair."

"Prince Gilbert, you don't look well today. Should I call a doctor?"

"...Alright."

Rejecting them was too troublesome, so he quietly accepted everything.

"Prince Gilbert, please at least eat a little more."

"...Alright."

He opened his mouth in response to the woman who offered him a spoonful of food.

Eating should have been irrelevant, but his heart still found his favorite dishes delicious.

"This is delicious."

The words that slipped out naturally made the woman in front of him smile with tears in her eyes.

(...She's happy about this...)

Even though he had lost his status and honor.

He still had his beauty, but that was all he had left.

He accepted everything quietly, thinking that being taken care of and maintaining his beauty would only last as long as it did.

After eating, he was asked to take a walk in the garden, so he reluctantly went outside.

The sky was covered in gray clouds, and it could rain at any moment.

Since Gilbert had told the servants that he didn't want to see the blue sky, this was the perfect weather for a walk.

The overgrown garden he had moved into was quickly tidied up by the gardeners.

He walked slowly, not really looking at anything.

He never took the initiative to go for a walk, but being outside was a good change of pace.

However, he felt no motivation or energy to do anything.

As he walked silently, he encountered a brown cat.

The cat glanced at Gilbert and then quickly looked away, crossing in front of him.

"It must have sneaked in from somewhere. I will remove it immediately."

"...It's fine. Leave it alone."

Gilbert turned his face away indifferently and started walking in the opposite direction.

In the past, he would have ordered it to be disposed of on the spot, but now he didn't care if a few cats were around.

He didn't feel angry. The cat just reminded him of her, and his chest ached a little.

***

Six months had passed since Gilbert began his quiet life in a corner of the palace.

In a space where time flowed gently, cut off from the outside world, he sat in a chair.

He had started to read books to pass the time, finding them boring but eventually becoming a bit more interested.

He preferred dictionaries and books of trivia over stories.

The useless knowledge he gained seemed not so bad.

The gentle breeze that blew in through the window caressed his cheek, and the sound of leaves rustling in the wind was soothing.

As he read quietly, a brown blur caught his eye.

He slowly shifted his gaze.

He met the eyes of a cat that had jumped from a tree branch to the window frame, but he quickly returned his focus to his book.

The cat settled there and started grooming itself, completely free.

The brown blur continued to move in the corner of his vision, but he ignored it and continued reading.

This was a familiar scene, and he felt no frustration.

Instead, a sense of loneliness always washed over him.

The cat seemed to be enjoying itself, and Gilbert was a bit curious, so he raised his head to look again.

At the same time, there was a knock, and a female servant entered the room.

"I will start cleaning the room. ...Oh, it's here again."

The woman slowly approached the cat and gently stroked its chin.

Gilbert saw the cat's affectionate behavior for the first time, noticing the clear difference from how it treated him.

(Cats get attached when treated kindly...)

He thought vaguely as he watched the scene quietly.

By the time the woman finished cleaning and left the room, the cat had also disappeared.

Gilbert stopped reading and stood up, slowly approaching the window and leaning against the frame.

The breeze ruffled his hair as he thought absently.

If he had cherished her more, treated her more kindly, would things have been different?

Would she still be here, smiling at him?

Unfulfilled wishes welled up, and a tear rolled down his cheek.

"...Damn, don't come to mind."

Gilbert pressed his hand to his chest.

Would this pain fade with time, and would he be able to look up at the blue sky again?

He quietly wished for the woman, who remained in his memory, to disappear from his heart.

Today, as always, he stood quietly in a corner of the detached palace.